Radio 1 DJs in puppet scandal

Shocking revelations uncover chain of BBC deceit dating back to the 1970s

Scott Mills, puppeteer's hand out of shot
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bowbrick/6483313703/

Radio 1 listeners described their anguish today as it was revealed that their favourite drive time presenters were in fact characters created by the BBC controllers and portrayed by ventriloquist dummies. 

Suspicions were aroused when a certain Radio 1 'DJ' was seen being handed CDs during a recent appearance at a nightlife hotspot in northern Scotland. Club-goers initially assumed the tracks were being selected for him to play in the same uninspired way he does the Radio 1 playlist, but fears were confirmed when the CD holder's other hand was spotted operating the drive time favourite from beneath the DJ booth. 

Public reaction appears to be largely of despair, with one attendee of the above event shrieking: "I knew the playlist was chosen, but I just can't believe puppets could be capable of such hilarious, clever and yet commercially viable comedy banter!" 

The BBC has announced an inquiry and promises to make amends, but it may be difficult to regain the trust of the Radio 1 listenership, particularly after insult was added to injury this morning when the corporation was forced to admit breakfast king Nick "Grimmy" Grimshaw was created using the Tony Blackburn puppet and adding new hair.