Jack White states obvious; garners little attention

Former White Stripes man hits out at the state of music today during recent interview

Jack White in concert, wearing nothing white or stripeyImage: 'Jack White' 
http://www.flickr.com/photos/99278318@N00/963441003

In an uninspired attempt to attract media attention after his latest album wasn't heralded as the most influential thing since ever, Jack White (whose album 'Blunderbuss' was released this year) has leapt on the bandwagon of criticising the style over substance approach of modern pop stars. The 'Sticky Thump' singer spoke specifically about Queen of Controversial Things Lady Gaga, making painstakingly evident observations in doing so.

  Describing the disco-stick-riding singer's persona as 'all artifice', White (whose album 'Blunderbuss' was released this year) seemed to be attempting to both mask the patently apparent nature of his comments while endearing himself to the pretentious. However, his plan was foiled when the music media as a whole rolled their eyes, let out a loud "Duh!" and returned to their daily routine of taking bribes from record labels and drinking tea.

'Thermos' flask and new 'Thermos' pitcher, available in
 all good stores and probably out of the boot of Jack White's car
Image: 'Orange & Black Vintage Thermos Flask and+Pitcher+Set' 
http://www.flickr.com/photos/42573918@N00/8095538757

   Reaction from the few members of the public that stumbled across the interview, in which White (whose album 'Blunderbuss' was released this year) also talked about the unpredictability of the weather and how 'Thermos' flasks keep hot things hot and cold things cold, was no different. Caitlin Jones, a four ("and a half!") year old girl, had this to say:

"So this guy is saying that Lady Gaga is just putting it on or something? I suppose he's going to break the news that Nicki Minaj is her sister and arch-nemesis any day now..."

   Her dog, a Shih Tzu called Mr Cuddles, declined to comment but did let out what appeared to be a contemptuous sigh.